Grabbed by the Ghoulies Excerpts (2005)
The following excerpts detailing the development of Grabbed by the Ghoulies was originally published on Rare’s Scribes letter page in 2005. We’ve scoured each edition for that year in order to provide you with every mention of the title to be found in Rare’s posted answers in chronological order below.
We’ve also included a link above each heading which will re-direct to the original letters page that the question was featured in should you wish to view it in the original context – otherwise you’ll find that the entries below only focus on answers related to Grabbed by the Ghoulies for a comprehensive listing for any fan wanting further information on pre-release content, hidden easter eggs, abandoned features and development secrets:
Peel my onions!
You said some of Fiddlesworth’s innuendos were taken out of Grabbed by the Ghoulies. All I can say to that is holy Cileriaq, how bad must they have been?
Well this is the internet. So feel free to let me know what they were.
Also, why are the Skeletons so smart? How comes they can lift up nearby objects but Zombies, Wizards and Hunchbacks can’t? I mean – Skeletons don’t even have any brains (they decayed) so surely they would be more stupid?
And another thing – why and how did the Baron get those Wizards to live in laundry rooms? They are powerful wizards, surely they should be wizarding or something elsewhere, not doing the Baron’s washing!”Suck my… no… get your hands on my… no, no…”
TA TA FOR NOW
Matthew
I bet you weren’t really expecting them, but here they are, direct from the head of the Ghoulies team. Parents: send your impressionable offspring out of the room. Pregnant women and people with heart problems: look away now.
“After a quick delve in my Recycle Bin, I’ve managed to unearth Fiddlesworth’s shocking profanities for everyone to finally enjoy.
*** DISCLAIMER – Any MS Legal folk or gentle souls offended by obscene vegetable and farmyard animal related quips should read no further. ***
“Sow My Seeds (stayed until the very last minute)
“Caress My Cucumber (stayed for perhaps only one version, funnily enough!)
“Manhandle My Marrow (then changed to Measure My Marrow but still to no avail)
“Bash My Beef (changed to Buy My Beef and was accepted)
“Rub My Radish
“Choke My Chicken
“Rub My Rooster (got changed to Roast My Rooster and was accepted)
“Gobble My Gherkin
“Wash My Lettuce (though I still don’t understand what the problem was with that. It wasn’t even particularly funny, let alone risqué!)
“Crunch My Carrots, Pick My Plums & Pet My Piglet ALMOST got thrown out but managed to stay by the skin of their teeth.
“Everyone knows that Skeletons are the smart guys – just look how clever they are in Jason and the Argonauts (until they fall off the cliff). Zombies are really thick and never think about picking stuff up, as if they wanted to catch more people they would simply run instead of shuffling. Wizards feel it beneath themselves to resort to sullying their magical appendages by picking up items, and the Hunchback’s got a bad back and can’t lift them.
“Regarding the washing Wizards, everyone seems to want young boy wizards with glasses these days, and all roles for elderly gentleman with pointy beards (Gandalf, Dumbledore etc.) have been filled, so they have to get any job they can find – including washing laundry. The Baron can’t be seen going commando, can he now?”
Dear Scribes,
Why do you put down people’s hopes of upcoming games, who are great, loyal fans of Rare? You are supposed to put interest into people, so they will go out and buy. All you do, editor, is make up little responses and jokes that really don’t answer anything people don’t already know.
Quote: “It’s a little-known fact that Banjo-Threeie was a secret unlockable feature in Ghoulies…”
You know there is big number of people who want Banjo Three. Ok, who gives a sh*te about Grabbed by the Ghoulies anyway? Even I, a major Rareware fan, looked at Grabbed by the Ghoulies and said to myself, “That looks like complete crap.”
Sorry if I seem harsh or insulting, but I’m just expressing my ideas. And I know you’re just being funny, but I really would like to hear something about Banjo Three, and some of Rare’s other upcoming titles beside Conker and Kameo.
These are just my thoughts which I hope you take into consideration. Thanks. Oh and can you actually reply to this message? It took a couple minutes and little effort to write this, so please respond.
Chris
Chill your boots, big man. If you view Scribes as something less than a goldmine of insider information and cutting-edge game updates, you’re spot on – and that’s because when we’ve got a big announcement to make or new game details to put forward, the letters page isn’t the first place that springs to mind. This whole Extras section of the site is, as the name suggests, just here to help people pass the time, have a bit of a laugh, maybe actually get representatives from the teams to answer questions (probably not in a very informative manner) now and again. We’ve never tried to pretend otherwise, so why should you? If you don’t enjoy it, don’t read it. When there’s something to announce, the front page and the News and Updates sections will always be the places to look, and right now there’s simply nothing solid about a new Banjo title to announce.
As for the Banjo-Threeie gag in particular, yes, we are aware of the existence of Banjo fans salivating over the prospect of a new game, and rascally japes like that one (which aren’t particularly convincing in the first place – I mean, come on, really) are partly the result of endless emails from people demanding new information on the game right now, regardless of whether or not it’s in development or even planned. Taking a healthy interest is one thing, but outright in-your-face rudeness is another, and you’d be amazed at how much of the latter we get. Well, maybe ‘amazed’ is a strong word, but you know what I mean.
Dear Rare,
I tell you something. Grabbed by Ghoulies is very good game. Same makers as Banjo and Donkey Kongs that were good! Make me so happy I give big hug, Ha Ha, yes?
Banjo started as Dream, eh? Dream started with boy lead character, yes? Is boy from Dream same boy as one from Grabbed by Ghoulies?
Thank you for time.
Heinz
“Thank you for your kind words,” respond the Ghoulies boys gracefully, “it’s not every day that we hear from someone who has played Ghoulies – let alone likes it. Yes, Banjo did start out as Dream and did indeed have a boy lead character in it. But it wasn’t Cooper from Ghoulies – it was a younger chap with a rubbish wooden sword and a dog. Who got replaced by a rabbit with a dog. Who got replaced by a bear with a dog. Who turned into Banjo with a bird. So now you know.”
Dear Scribes,
Just a few words from the dynamic duo of father and son, who just this weekend completed, maimed our way through, broke and in all ways possible learned all there is to know of the little-known masterpiece that is Grabbed by the Ghoulies.
The thing is, we should have gone camping. Planned it for weeks but finally decided against it Friday afternoon and made a secret vow not to relent, give up, despair or in any way admit defeat until we’d achieved our goal of cracking this sucker (the game IS somewhat easy, but that’s totally besides the point).
The thing about camping in Denmark is that, well there’s no way around it, it’s just not that exciting. The country’s mostly flat, there are no mountains, there are hills (in fact calling them hills is a bit misleading, they’re more like grassy knolls really), no canyons, valleys or even gargantuan fjords like they have in Norway. No rivers or hugely interesting lakes to put up your tent along the banks of. There ARE streams but they’re smallish in a minute kind of way. The woods are quite alright, but they’re probably quite damp and cold right now, and thus not really that inviting.
Where was I? Oh yeah, the game. We had a great time. In fact, I can’t remember having had so much fun playing a game for ages, and neither can my son. Smashing our way through hordes of beasties with frying pans, boards etc. was just pure fun – and it felt great. Please be sure to pass on our thanks to the talented people behind the game. The Rare magic’s still very much intact.
One last thing. My son just informed me, that he’ll be going as a Ninja Imp for the school Christmas party.
Cheers,
Noah and Michael
See, it’s not every developer’s website that offers you basic lessons in Scandinavian topography in between the stuff about their games. And I’ve just realised there’s been a proper team response for every question so far, instead of a load of made-up rubbish from me. And we’re not stopping yet! Feel the power!
“Wow! Two separate people in the same Scribes that like Ghoulies – it’s like Christmas come (very) early! Glad you liked the game Noah and Michael – it’s nice to see fathers that can use video games to spend time with their family, rather than being locked up alone in little dark rooms playing mind-altering violent thuggery as the mass media likes to portray. I actually recall my parents trying their hand at gaming back in the early 1980s, but their skills on the Speccy’s Horace Goes Skiing left quite a bit to be desired.
“Camping in the UK sounds better than Denmark, as we do have a few hills, valleys and the like. But you also have to have a horrendously untrendy fleece top, big clumpy boots, a beard, a blantant disregard for private property by marching all over it on ‘rambles’ and to be able to sing awful camp fire songs to fit in properly. I actually went camping in Wales last year but I spent more time in the pub than my tent. And of course it rained.
“Good luck to your son and his Ninja Impishness. We at Rare like to dress up occasionally for our Christmas parties and we’ve seen people come as lobsters, Daleks and even a bottle of vitaman tablets. Disturbingly, we have also experienced men dressed as (not very convincing) women and Grant singing to us all wearing a plastic arse.”
Dear Scribes,
Okay now, this has been bothering me for quite some time. I’ll do my best to avoid a numbered list.
What, may I ask, is the big finger-licking deal about the Killer Instinct franchise? Not trying to cut you guys, but it wasn’t all that much greater than any other fighting game. But still, everybody has been asking since before I can remember for another sequel. All of the time, on various Rare message boards, on Scribes, in Tepid Seats, everywhere, and you always reply with some smart-arsed remark. Why do they want a KI3 so bad, anyway? I’m interested to know your opinion on the subject. And if you can arse a couple of other people, please do so. I don’t care if it’s your bloody janitor, I just want to see if I’m alone in my dissent.
Also, can you believe (and I’m serious; I don’t think these people were joking), that some people actually decided to go look for BK3 in Grabbed by the Ghoulies, due to Mr. Mayles’ crack about it? I mean, Stop N Swop was fun to look for, but really – can’t we all move on?
This one goes to DKC‘s designer (or if he can’t be arsed, maybe his brother), what are your opinions on Nintendo’s new game Donkey Kong: Jungle Beat? I’ll admit I’ve played Donkey Konga, and despite my hatred of it, it was fun, but come on – Jungle Beat has no excuse. Even if it’s fun, it still looks like a drugtrip. There are multiple pictures that support this theory, so it’s not like I’m just insanely rambling.
One more thing, if you’ve ever seen the movie The Goonies, did you find it comical that they named the pirate One Eyed Willy?
Thank you, goodnight.
Tucker Beard
Can of worms! The whole KI3 issue is horses for courses, I suppose. If you’re a fan, you clamour for new info; if you’re not, you couldn’t care less. Personally I used to be a big KI fan back in the day (I wangled my way in here just in time for the sequel), but while I can still sympathise with the viewpoint of those ‘patiently’ waiting fans, any series begins to lose its appeal after you’ve fielded the several hundredth futile, angry demand for new information. Still, I’d be as interested in seeing KI3 as anyone else – there’s just nothing to tell at the moment.
Now, let’s see what our Ghoulies designer friend has to say about the BK3 ‘controversy’…
“No, I didn’t expect anyone to look for BK3 in Ghoulies, but then again I didn’t expect the ashes of the ashes of the ashes that was once Stop n’ Swap to keep being raked over. The guys at the Rare Witch Project have come pretty close to solving that, but of course we’re not going to reveal the whole truth to them as it would spoil their fun. They’ll need all their hacking prowess if we ever release BK3 as not only will it connect to the first two games, but WOPPA from War Games and the NASA mainframe. Maybe even Captain Skyhawk 2.
“As for DKJB – it’s awful. Well, actually it’s not – as from what I played at E3 in 2004 it was very enjoyable, but made you look like a bit of a idiot judging by some of the suited types with no co-ordination that were playing it. I just applaud them for trying something different.
“One Eyed Willy? I don’t know what you’re talking about. Next you’ll be telling me about certain characters that didn’t exist in Captain Pugwash…”
Dear Sir,
Grabbed by the Ghoulies was a fantastic game. I enjoyed it all (even Challenge 21, where I had to force a screwdriver into my ear to distract myself from the anguish it caused), but I weep for the characters that we’ll never see again. I’m aware that it didn’t generate many sales, but these fictional individuals shouldn’t be punished for the poor taste of the mass market. I mean, there’s so many unanswered questions. Where did Dr. Krackpot go? What of the unspoken but smoldering sexual intensity between Fiddlesworth and Babs Buffbrass? What’s next for the Baron?
It then struck me that the GBA team missed a wonderful oppurtunity to reintroduce Von Ghoul in the Banjo-verse. Recently, a little something called Banjo Pilot was released, where the characters mull about in their own personal airplanes. Personal airplanes? WHAT ABOUT BARON VON GHOUL? His entire gimmick was that he built himself into a small plane, and I should know, because that d*ck killed me (excuse me… made me faint) so many times with that propeller in Challenge 21. As the image made by Ben Kosmina that I’ve attached shows, the Baron fits in rather well with Humba Wumba and these other jokers.
I plead with you not to make this mistake again. It’s time to reward the scrappy handful of Ghoulies fans out there, and this being the Internet, I figured out a surefire way to force you to cave in to our demands. I created a petition! That’s right, it’s the “Insert Mr. Ribs Snugly Into the Banjo-Kazooie Franchise Petition”. You see, Mr. Ribs was surely the greatest Rare creation since Jolly Roger, and while there may never be a proper sequel to Ghoulies, you could at least ease our pain by making Mr. Ribs a Banjo-Kazooie character. He fits in fairly well with the style of those games, and while he may be from a poorly-selling title, I’m sure that his genius will shine through and reach a whole new audience.
http://www.petitiononline.com/MrRibs/petition.html. 14 signatures so far. That was enough to get Tiptup his own game, right?
Oh.
SirSlush2
P.S. Banjo-Kazoomie was a better title.
More from the Ghoulies boys… they’re busy this month.
“Krackpot cheaply ‘escaped’ as his proposed boss battle with himself and ‘Krankenstein’ was tragically shelved. Fiddlesworth and Babs probably hooked up after stealing the Baron’s silver, and as for the Baron – the retirement home for unappreciated main baddies in commercially challenged games is where he’ll be heading. You’ll also recall his plane was smashed so he couldn’t take part in Banjo Pilot even if he wanted to, despite him not being in any of the Banjo games, either.
“Mr. Ribs is indeed one of our most loved characters and it would be absolutely criminal if he couldn’t make a reappearance sometime soon. Maybe he’ll depose that long-in-the-tooth and sooooo ’90s Mr. Pants and take over our website, waiting several years until he gets his very own game?”
Mr. Pants, ’90s? Are you kidding? He’s got more in common with the Neanderthal cave painting era.
PS Slush, you pain me. It was so not.
Dear Scribes,
I’ve been a huge fan of Rare for years ever since Banjo-Kazooie, and (stupidly enough) I just recently found your website. I was reading through your Scribes section of your web page, and read the one where someone complains that they haven’t heard about Banjo-Threeie for ages (which I was also curious about) and you said that Banjo-Threeie is a unlickable in Grabbed by the Ghoulies. Did you mean the whole game? And if so, WOW, and how do you get it?
Please don’t make fun of me… aaah you’re gonna do it anyway,
Martin Macdonald
As you weren’t the only person to take it seriously, I wasn’t immediately inclined to make fun of you… but then you said ‘unlickable’. Ha ha, Martin said ‘unlickable’ and he thought the Banjo-Threeie thing was real. I bet he’s got wonky eyes and athlete’s foot as well.
Dear Scribes,
Hi there, I’ve just finished playing Grabbed by the Ghoulies on Xbox, brilliant game by the way, played it solidly for over two weeks, anyway my question: at the end they walk off towards another spooky-sounding town followed by Baron Von Ghoul, is there a sequel in the works?
Also has any decision been made as to whether you’ll produce any DS games, I hope so.
Regards,
Rob
DS games: yes. Do keep up. Ghoulies sequels: probably not. From the horse’s (designer’s) mouth: “Thanks for your kind words about our Haunted House-a-thon, but I’m afraid that Ghouly fans (all six of you) will be unlikely to see a sequel, due to its relative lack of success compared with our other games. Although the performance of a game at retail is the ultimate indicator of success, Ghoulies was perhaps not the right game at the right time on the right platform. The team was disappointed by its performance, but we have lost none of our desire to create exciting new IP and experiences, the results of which will be announced within the next few months. But in my eyes, Mr. Ribs is one of the best characters we have ever created and his role as a cheap cameo (á la Mr. Pants) is guaranteed for years to come. Maybe we’ll create a one-off Mr. Ribs Xbox 360 faceplate, get it signed by a few bigwigs at Microsoft and then try to flog it for £500 on eBay.”
Yo Rare!
It’s good to see a decent British development company still producing decent games in this day and age, what with the fall of so many development houses to soulless corporations who absorb the company’s identity and turn their games into crap (and not the singing stuff). It’s good to see that under MS you’re producing as great, if not better games than ever. As is customary for the majority of people who write to Scribes, I’ve got a bunch of questions you may or may not want to answer, and to make sure most have never been answered before, I’m making all but one as obscure as possible.
1) Is it embarrassing being owned by MS? I mean, it means that people can say ‘MS 0wnz0rz j00’, and as embarrassing as it is for them that they’re using 1337 and supporting MS, it’s completely true in your case.
2) How come Kameo‘s taking so long?
3) If I claimed that Ghoulies has made me unable to operate in normal society because I’m absolutely petrified of corridors full of mounted animal heads, then would you give me free games?
4) Talking of Ghoulies, what do ghost pirates have to do with mansions?
5) Do you want any Gmail invites? I’ve got 50 of these damn things, and I just can’t get rid of them.
6) What do you guys do with your 5 BAFTA statuettes? Ever tried jumping out at people from behind stuff with them, or perhaps using them as an improvised audience when practising for picking up even more awards?
So yeah, answer those, and I promise I’ll buy Conker: Live & Reloaded, vote for it in any game of the year polls, and lick your shoes clean if I ever see you in the street. Not that I’m desperate for you to answer these questions or anything. Dear me, no.
Yours Indesperately,
Markusdragon (Mark Cope)
PS: 7) Why do so many people insist on writing a PS? Couldn’t what they say afterwards generally be discussed in the main body of the letter?
Big fat mail requires big fat response. Let’s see how much of it the Ghoulies team leader will take care of for me.
“Cheers for the compliments Mark, we’re still driven to creating the best games we possibly can. When the day comes that I don’t enjoy what I do any more then it will be time to retire, but until then we’ll just ignore the ‘you are crap now you are with Microsoft’ comments and just get on with trying to entertain gamers such as yourself. So, in response to your questions:
1) Not at all, I think most people are proud. Rare has retained its culture almost 100% and any changes that have been made are for the better. We have a huge resource we can call upon when required and cut-price games in the Microsoft Store go down very nicely, thank you.
2) It’s not, it’s finished! I’m sure there are now many interviews around that will answer your question.
3) Yes, so long as they’re copies of Ghoulies. Last count I think we had 2,153,667 unsold ones spare. If you’re scared of walking down a corridor full of stuffed heads, imagine what it would be like walking down our corridor at work and seeing the bowel-loosening sight of the grotesque heads belonging to the team working on our secret, as yet unannounced game that isn’t KI.
4) Not a lot, I just like pirates and do my best to get one into every game I’m involved in.
5) Being a technical buffoon, I don’t know what a Gmail is. I suggest you send it on to 50 more people like some kind of pyramid scheme. Tell them they’ll get rich if they do or suffer bad luck forever if they don’t.
6) They’re on display in our Reception area, guarded by a full-size Banjo costume and various cardboard cut-outs. Occasionally we fetch them out of their cabinets and hold them aloft Zelda-style while a fanfare plays and stars swirl around.
7) I think they must think it’s clever and original. It isn’t – which is why we don’t do it.”
Right then, now to deal with all your questions he didn’t answer… oh. Next!
Dear Scribes,
Is there a track list for the sound test in Star Fox Adventures? It would be easier to find the right tune if there was one.
I also want to request the Vampire Chickens tune, from Grabbed by the Ghoulies. I love that tune! Too bad there isn’t a soundtrack for the game. Grant really did a fine job on that game!
Erik
We’ve had the SFA tracklist question before, and I don’t think we’ve actually got one to give out. Just as well, then, that the soundtrack to your average everyday Vampire Chicken onslaught proved a bit easier to get hold of. “Cluck cluck, etc.” says Grant.