Top 5 Reasons Mr. Pants is the Greatest Gaming Protagonist of all time
After a brief twelve-month hiatus, the month of November has returned with the festive fervor of Pants Day in tow. While the uninitiated may question our seemingly benign tradition to celebrate Rare‘s poorly designed and physically unfit website mascot, we only have to take pity on their ignorance. Pants Day isn’t just about receiving gifts – primarily because it doesn’t involve gifts in the slightest – but rather observing the man that makes the entire unpaid holiday possible. Join us in our mundane Pants Day festivities, as we honor the greatness in skivvies that is Mr. Pants, with another annual tribute in his name.
These are the Top 5 Reasons Mr. Pants is the Greatest Gaming Protagonist of all time.
#5. HE MADE HIS FIRST IMPRESSION HIS BEST BEFORE STEPPING OUT OF THE LIMELIGHT
Playwright Billy Shakes once quipped vicariously through Hamlet, “Brevity is the soul of wit“, and we can only presume that he was foreshadowing the impact of It’s Mr. Pants. In an industry that lavishes sequels and multi-grossing installments, popular licenses and characters will inevitably become over-saturated and fall out of favor when gamers lust for something greater. Mr. Pants is this greater. Fame, fortune, restraining orders, our hero could have had it all – instead, he has but one title to his name; his first release an unexpected magnum opus. Hardly capable of topping perfection, Rare has bowed out from a much-anticipated sequel or needless DLC to complement the portable offering, as it would only debase the impact of the original; you only have one chance at a good first impression.
#4. HE IS A MINIMALIST WORKING ON THE SEAT OF HIS OWN WIT AND CUNNING
More often than not, the average protagonist is expected to undergo some sort of transformation, either figurative or literal in order to take on the Big Bad without having their face rearranged. Powerful weapons, health upgrades, impenetrable armor and gadgets become part of the heroes arsenal, but this raises the question on whether the hero is not simply an accessory or tool to their own inventory, inversely. Mr. Pants isn’t having any existential crisis of the sort – his design is coarse, base, offensive to some, but it’s all he has to take on the world with. If Mr. Pants is perfection, (and it’s hard not to consider when you see his chiseled features and raw machismo in action), then it must logically start and end with the bare basics. That said, you just can’t get more basic or bare than a brilliant pair of red underpants.
#3. HE IS A SELFLESS HERO THAT ACTS WITHOUT THE NEED OF MOTIVATION OR INCENTIVE
Spurring your average protagonist against the forces of evil with a few kidnapped Princesses is par for the course, but without a personal vendetta or promise of future gratification, your hero is just acting on a selfish impulse to essentially reward themselves when everything has been settled. The cads! Mr. Pants has managed to conquer the Universe, he has claimed planets with a flag in his likeness and even had some spare time to squeeze in a few rounds of Pants Putt – which is an entirely innocent golf euphemism we’re told. Nary a Princess in danger, nor an intergalactic threat roused Mr. Pants into getting things done; Mr. Pants did these things simply because he could. Now imagine if he were actually inspired to do something and his potential rockets past the abilities of your typical self-serving hero.
#2. HE HAS MANAGED TO STAND THE TEST OF TIME WITHOUT BECOMING TOO PREDICTABLE
From his humble beginnings, Mr. Pants presided over the Pantsboard and Survey sections of Rare‘s website with untapped charisma could be imitated by no other. At the turn of the century It’s Mr. Pants was unlike anything even his most die-hard of fans were expecting, but the charm was still as fresh as ever. While the gaming giants will always manage to fall back on their strong suits, Mr. Pants isn’t about to rely on familiar material to entice his audience to stick around – even if it means listening to a pasty grown man shrill, “My brain hurts!” while a cacophony of loons lull you into insanity – it’s hardly the treaded ground. We haven’t seen much of Mr. Pants these days, but if you start to let your guard down it will only be all the more shocking when he returns in leopard print or dawning a fedora. Always fresh!
#1. HE REPRESENTS ALL OF US, AND IS ALSO NONE OF US AT THE SAME TIME
It can be a harrowing experience if you can identify with Mr. Pants in the slightest, and perhaps the provocation of putting some pants on might lead you into the right direction during a job interview. Aesthetics aside however, Mr. Pants shares a home with his loving wife, Mrs. Pie and their estranged son, Toby – a mundane existence that is all the more impressive when considering his accomplishments. Mr. Pants bridges the gap between the unremarkable everyman and the altruistic ‘chosen one’ tasked with saving the galaxy and beyond. He represents the provider, a hero in all contexts. He represents our potential, as well as our shortcomings. He may appear to be just a rotund man in a pair of red underpants, but with a little bit of charm and a bowler hat, he is transformed. He is Mr. Pants, and this is his day.
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